Really Awful Movies: Ep 69 – American Ninja

Forget the Big Lebowski. Our Dude is Dudikoff. The deadliest art of the Orient is now in the hands of an American! Lucky us. This is a piece of Cannon Camembert, in which as an alternative to sentencing, a judge decrees that juvenile delinquent Joe Armstrong (Michael Dudikoff) must join the Armed Forces. It’s a […]

Really Awful Movies: Ep 64 – Road House

Will cooler heads prevail? No. A “cooler” is a professional doorman whose job it is to manage other doormen. It’s the top rung in the bouncer profession and here that man is Dalton, played by the incomparable Dirty Dancer himself Patrick Swayze. In Road House (1989), a bar owner goes on a talent search to […]

Really Awful Movies: Ep 55 – Double Impact

Double Impact is double the damage – double the Van Damme-age to be exact. Before you may have thought “double impact” to be a really ugly type of font, but it’s also a really cheesy movie. This martial arts action flick features mono-zygotic twin Van Dammes, running around Hong Kong. They’re also quite monosyllabic. The […]