Really Awful Movies: Ep 184 – Conan the Barbarian



Conan the Barbarian is a sword and sandals epic, which meant a lot to us as youngsters. Ergo, we have to visit it (or revisit it) for the Really Awful Movies Podcast.

The 1982 American fantasy adventure film was directed and co-written by John Milius (and co-written by legendary crank Oliver Stone).

The adventure is based on stories by Robert E. Howard, a 1930s pulp fiction writer. The novel chronicles the eponymous Conan in a fictional pre-historic world of black magic and savagery.

The film stars Arnold Schwarzenegger as our hero and James Earl Jones as the chief antagonist. Conan the Barbarian tells the story of a young barbarian (Schwarzenegger) who seeks vengeance for the death of his father at the hands of the fantastically-named Thulsa Doom (Jones), the leader of a snake cult.

Buzz Feitshans and Raffaella De Laurentiis produced the film for her father Dino De Laurentiis, with Edward R. Pressman as an executive producer. Greek musician Basil Poledouris (RoboCop / Red Dawn) composed the music. Roger Ebert said this about Conan the Barbarian: “The movie is a triumph of production design, set decoration, special effects and makeup. At a time when most of the big box-office winners display state-of-the-art technology, “Conan” ranks right up there with the best.”

On this episode of the podcast, Jeff and Chris examine:

  • monomyths
  • watching terrible television in Israel
  • awful mullet hairstyles
  • the epic soundtrack
  • the a la carte mythology
  • early Arnold Schwarzenegger movies
  • steroids and Hulk Hogan

Really Awful Movies: Ep 183 – Blacula



This puts the sucking in I’m Gonna Git You Sucka? Anyway, here’s a terrific African American vampire movie…a portmanteau of black and Dracula (obviously). And that movie is: Blacula. The flick stars the imposing, booming-voiced actor, William Marshall (a Bard-trained theater guy brings great gravitas to the role of The Count. .

He plays an 18th-century African prince named Mamuwalde, who is turned into a vampire (and later locked in a coffin) by Count Dracula in the Count’s castle in Transylvania in the year 1780 after Dracula refuses to help Mamuwalde suppress the North African / European slave trade.

Two centuries later, in the year 1972, two very effete interior decorators from modern-day La La Land, travel to Eastern Europe and unknowingly purchase a rare piece of furniture – Blacula’s coffin. They have it shipped to Los Angeles…and you guessed it… All hell breaks loose.

Blacula was followed by the sequel Scream Blacula Scream in 1973 and inspired a wave of blaxploitation-themed horror films.

On this episode of the Really Awful Movies Podcast, Jeff and Chris break down:

  • Vampire movies
  • Our love of blaxploitation
  • The terrific performance of William Marshall
  • The ways in which Blacula differs from traditional horror and traditional blaxploitation