Really Awful Movies: Ep 237 – The Country Bears

Animatronic country music-playing bears in a movie based on a Disney attraction. How could this go wrong? Or another question, How is this even possible? On the Really Awful Movies Podcast, we pride ourselves on tackling all sorts of disparate different genres, so hot on the heels of talking about C.H.U.D., here we are yakking about The Country Bears. Haven’t heard of it? You’re not alone. This was a big fat bomb, despite having a bunch of big names attached to it: Elton John, Wyclef Jean, Willie Nelson, etc.

Beary (that’s a homophone of “Barry” as you likely figured out) is a young bear who runs away from his adopted human family, to track down, and ultimately reunite the titular Country Bears band.

Is it a “foot-stomping, crowd-pleasing, heartwarming romp” as the poster suggests? This is a legitimately terrible film, and yet it’s somehow endearing, a bit like a rusted husk jalopy that’s been dragged out to the scrap heap for crushin’.

There are some admittedly fun musical numbers, as well as some bonkers cameos by the likes of Eagles front-man Don Henley, and blues belter Bonnie Raitt.

So how does this film, er, raitt? Tune in and check out this special episode of the Really Awful Movies Podcast. This is the second pretty bad musical we’ve invested ourselves with in as many weeks…we do kinda love musicals, especially wacko ones like The Apple and Xanadu. Guess this falls in the same camp.

Join us!

 

 

Really Awful Movies: Ep 234 – Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band

We’re optimists when it comes to cinema. Despite the (often ironic) title of our podcast, we strive (whenever possible) to see the good in everything. However, Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band pushed us to the brink.

This is the musical equivalent of C-SPAN: long, dull stretches of banality. And that’s shocking as the source material comes courtesy of arguably the greatest band of all-time, The Beatles. But what’s done to their music is as much a crime as the fashion variety, above.

Sgt. Pepper’s is an attempt to slap a story together around the album of the same name, and everyone connected to the Fab Four (save for George Martin and Billy Preston) had the good sense to stay the hell away.

The Lonely Hearts Club Band comprises the Bee Gees, and Peter Frampton. They sign a deal with BD records, who immediately tries to exploit them and steal their “magical” instruments. Alice Cooper and Aerosmith appear as evil villains, with the Bad Boys from Boston decked out in some kind of odd Fascist uniform regalia.

Ex-Vaudeville legend George Burns, sorta ties the proceedings together as the kindly narrator – and it’s a good thing too, as without him, the film would approach nigh-incomprehensibility.

It’s hard to pick which musical number is the worst, but there are some front-runners including Barry Gibb’s butchering of, “A Day in the Life.” It feels more like a week.

Still, your intrepid hosts soldier on, plowing through a different genre film every week. While we focus on horror and action, we delight in tackling the odd bizarro musical flop like this one. If you like what you hear on the Really Awful Movies Podcast, tune in and be sure to leave us a review on iTunes.

 

Really Awful Movies: Ep 179 – From Justin to Kelly

Charitably listed as a “comedy” on IMDb, the laughs are always unintentional in the horrific, From Justin to Kelly.

And the synopsis is thus: “A waitress from Texas and a college student from Pennsylvania (‘the Pennsylvania Posse’, a group that includes the fro-ed Justin Guarini) meet during spring break in Fort Lauderdale, Florida and come together through their shared love of singing.” They certainly don’t come together in any other sense as this thing is TAME TAME TAME. The occasional beer is quaffed (not nearly as many as we’d regularly consume during a podcast recording) and an endless array of set pieces prevent Justin (Guarini) from finally meeting up with Kelly (Clarkson).

And no fireworks can be had. Not the barest of sprinkles, or the faintest of explosions.

So why this musical? We actually like musicals, and have discussed several on the Really Awful Movies Podcast, a program devoted to genre cinema.

If you’re a fan of American Idol or The Voice, you’ll know that while the latter consistently struggles with “putting over” (to use a WWE term) its talent, American Idol has actually produced a few bona fide stars. Kelly Clarkson is one of them, a pop culture supernova immortalized in the 40-Year-Old Virgin. Justin Guarini, is not one of them. So it’s interesting to see where their careers headed after this shameless cash grab.

So, sit back, take a listen to a few of the tunes, and of course…WATCH THE MOVIE FIRST and join us for a discussion of…From Justin to Kelly. And subscribe too.